I have decided I need to get back in touch with my badass side. I’ve always been tough and my attitude and fighting spirit have gotten me through so much in my life.
I’ve found that the last year or so, I’ve really tamed down a lot. And that’s not all a bad thing! I’m so blessed to have the spiritual, physical, and mental benefits of love, peace, joy, and happiness in my life from my marriage, pets, education, yoga, dance, friends, etc.
However, I think in some ways my “loss” of some of my badassness has been due to my health issues as well as the convenience of having a wonderful reliable husband around.
I’ve realized though that I need to get it back. I need to retain my strength and spark even though I put such a focus on being calm. I think it can be easy to rely on your husband to take care of things around the house and protect you and make you feel safe (even though those were things I always used to do for myself). Its easy to get so caught up in yoga and meditation that you put up blinders and place all of your focus on peace and love and start to forget about the other parts of the world that require strength and courage to face Now of course a certain amount of that is good. It’s good to rely on each other, it’s good to aspire for peace and calm. But you need a balance.
I need to rediscover the parts of myself that used to run 10 miles on a random day, do crossfit workouts, kickboxing, and free climbing. I need to find a balance between calmness and assertiveness. I need to take my old kickass attitude, but blend it with my new peaceful and more levelheaded spirit.
I want to be back into my long runs, heavy lifting, martial arts, badass attitude, and sense of self, safety, and strength by the end of the winter!